Changes
by erinjoy29
Summary: For Payson, things had changed for the worse since Sasha left. Now, she's going to do whatever it takes to get to the Olympics. Including abandoning her family, The Rock and her new coach Dmitri Belov.


_Keeler Residence_

_September, 2010_

Payson threw her gym bag onto the floor of her room before ripping the hair-tie out of her hair. She'd had enough of this. Sasha had left them, and they were now being coached by his father. Who, for some reason, seemed to have it out for her. She was confused. She had done nothing wrong to make him ignore her, and she needed a coach who knew her and knew what she was capable of. Dmitri Belov was not the coach for who would get her to the Olympics.

He didn't have faith in her. Sure, he believed that Sasha believed in her, but he didn't believe in her as much as Sasha did. He'd taken a shine to Becca, her own sister, and convinced her to start seriously training to be an elite; something that Sasha had failed to do. He was so focussed on helping Becca become a serious Olympic contender, getting Kaylie back to her former weight and still maintaining her DOD, encouraging Lauren and helping Emily to get more control that he didn't have time to coach her.

She needed a different coach; one who would be willing to focus on her, and help her become a better artistic gymnast. She may have been good enough to be going to Worlds, but she didn't feel she was good enough for the Olympics yet. With only six weeks until Worlds, she was getting worried. She needed to be the best she had ever been if she was going to show the world she deserved her place in Rotterdam. One mistake is all it would take for everyone to assume she wasn't ready; that her performance at the Worlds Team Trials was a fluke. She needed her respect as a gymnast back. She needed to prove to the world that she deserved to be a gymnast to watch for the Olympics.

Deep down, she knew she could do it. She knows she has what it takes to go to Worlds and bring back gold. But that underlying doubt surfaces every time she thinks about going to Worlds without Sasha. She came to rely on him so much after her accident. He became her confidant, her best friend and the person she trusted most in this world. And he left. He just left her here, and while he had his reasons, she thought they were crap. A part of her resented him for leaving her when she needed him most. He was supposed to be by her side when she competed in London in 2012. But he was gone.

She knew it was all her fault. She assumed the real reason he left was because she had ruined everything by kissing him. It had been the happiest moment she'd had in a long time until he'd pushed her away. Despite knowing it was wrong; and if Sasha's reaction was anything to go by, she could tell he didn't feel that way for her at all; she still liked to daydream that he had just kissed her back. Sometimes she had dreams that they lived happily ever after and eventually had a gym of their own to coach at. But that wasn't the case. She put her feelings aside and took what she could get. She settled for having a coach that believed in her and admired her.

After walking over to her mirror she took down a piece of paper. It was getting a bit worn and had numerous tearstains on it. She looked at the letter Sasha had written her; and re-read it for the thousandth time. His words constantly crossed her mind. As she read, she got more and more apprehensive about her gymnastics career. She didn't need Kaylie, Lauren and Emily. She needed _him_. It was the letter that finally spurred her into action. She grabbed her suitcase and shoved as many clothes as she could into it. She packed her gym bag and looked up bus times on the internet before checking her wallet for money. The last thing she packed was the letter from Sasha. She put it in her gym-bag because she wanted to keep it close to her at all times. It was going to get her through when she needed to be reminded that somebody believed in her.

She was about to leave when she realised she had to assure her parents she would be okay. She couldn't have them following her, but she definitely didn't want them worrying about her. She would be fine. She knew exactly where she was going. But first, she had to write them a letter, it was only right.

_Dear Mom, Dad and Becca,_

_I'm so sorry to do this, but it's the only option I have left. I'm leaving. I don't want you to worry or come after me, so I'm not telling you where I'm going. I just want you to know that I'll be safe._

_I'm not giving up on my gymnastics. I'm going to find someone else to train me; you know that Dmitri Belov doesn't like me for some reason. I normally wouldn't react like this, but it's affecting my chances at Worlds, and therefore at the Olympics. I don't want to inconvenience the family anymore, so I'm going alone. I know that you would come with me in a heart-beat, but Becca is happy at The Rock, and Dmitri loves her. He has her picked as his Olympic champion. You need to stay for her._

_Since Becca's competing as an elite now, I'll still see you at events. I promise I'll be there at Nationals next year; and you can watch me at Worlds, because there's no way I'm not going._

_I love you all so much, and I'm going to miss you like crazy. I'll call you as soon as I can. Please don't come after me, it's the one last thing I ask of you._

_Love,_

_Payson._

She placed the letter on the kitchen bench where her mother would surely find it in the morning. She'd be long gone by then. She closed the door to her room and walked down the hallway. Opening the front door, she looked back at her parents' room where they were fast asleep. She summoned all the courage she could and turned her back on them, walking out the door. As the lock clicked behind her, she stopped and thought for a second. _I have to do this. It's now or never; and I need him to do this._ With that, she took her first steps down her driveway and down the road to the bus-stop.

She was going to Cambria, California. Sasha Belov was going to agree to coach her again, because she wasn't going to leave until he did. She had a feeling he was going to regret telling her where to find him in the case of an emergency. To be fair, according to Payson, this _was_ an emergency.

As Payson sat on the bus heading out of Boulder, she took the letter from Sasha out once more. She was assured that she was making the right decision as she read the last few lines one more time:

_I told you something on my first day training you at The Rock. I don't think you'll remember, so I'm going to say it again. You are a beautiful young woman, Payson Keeler. Let that shine through and you will show the world that you are the champion _I_ always knew you were._

_Love,_

_Sasha_

* * *

AN: I don't really know whether to continue this. I've never written a multi-chapter story before, but I've been debating giving it a try. However, I couldn't get this out of my head. I liked the idea of Payson going off and finding Sasha and making him coach her again.

I also changed the ending of the letter to suit this story better. Assume that what we could actually read of the end of the letter in the finale is somewhere in the middle.


End file.
